I write this totally pissed.. moms moms momsssss boy I tell ya...
It is suppose to be that we are taking MiniMe and a friend of hers to the apple farm this Saturday.. and since it was Halloween eve.. there would be special halloween stuff going especially with the hayrides and corn maze...
We go every year.. and usually we go pretty early so The Mother can leave early and retreat to her *sanctuary* where it is she gets comatose on her prescription drugs.. cuz yanno.. after all.. it IS her only day off since she has church on Sunday..
Well this year.. I asked if we could go a little bit later so I can go to my class at church first before we head out.. that way we are not there all day waiting for it to get dark for the corn maze & hayride, she would get to sleep in.. blah blah blah.. i tried to show how it could benefit her as well as me wanting to go to class at church.. well.. a phone call today changed all of that.. silly me to think we can do things that isnt exactly her way for once.. and what was I possibly thinking that should would dare be out all out of the night (till 8pm) and the later it is the more people and whine whine whine moan moan moan... good grief give me a freaking break already... and then she has to get up earrrrrly in the morning to take her friend to church whose walker she has to lift and after being out alll day into the night her back is gonna be hurting and she isn't going to be able to lift the walker into the car...
I gotta admit.. the lady in the walker bit pissed me off... I mean this same lady in the walker was the reason she couldnt watch MiniMe for countless Sundays cuz MiniMe wouldnt have a place to sit cuz the walker is in the back seat... oh and the church ladies are riding with her and whatever shall she tell one of them that she cant pick them up for church because she would have the MiniMe in tow and lets not forget the countless Sunday Masses she missed when MiniMe read or performed during family mass at her school.. I dont think this is what God intends when He wants us to serve Him and the church.. yanno.. all my freaking life... yeah Im pissed and trying to stop cussing (bad combo) Ive had to deal with SO MANY OTHER people, places things and situations coming before me and now us.. first it was the married boyfriend who with us off and on for year whom she finally married.. then it was the many boyfriends in between and lets not forget the beer, lithium and sleep combination that I had to endure.. dammit
When can something be about somebody else besides her?
Ive done had enough of her.. really I have... and she wonders why I wanted to move out the state.. silly me for thinking she was going to change and we would have a relationship once I moved back here... silly me.
OMG, I SO get it! Best thing you can do is never rely on her. Just be mother and daughter, ask for nothing. That way if you don't expect anything, you won't be disappointed. *hugs*
ReplyDeleteyeah... i rememba the babysitting issue.. i tell you.. the ONLY people who can hurt and heal in one fell swoop.... mothers.
ReplyDeleteHi it's Deanna, I Know how you feel I even tried just letting my mom know how I felt but she would just stop talking to me. Now I just TRY to accept her for who she is and just let her actions motivate me to be a better mom to my son.
ReplyDeleteThanks all!! I dont rely on her.. I know better... I dont ask for anything and I expect nothing.. whatever she gives is fine.. what she doesnt is fine... I am good either way.. and Ive stop asking her to do anything.. Im good with that as well.. Ive decided that Im going to go to my class at church and Im cancelling the apple orchard this weekend and Imma take MiniMe to Navy Pier and see the movie the Legend of something about the owls and thats gonna be THAT!!!!
ReplyDeleteYou Can Only Giver Her And The Situation to God... Cuz only God And God ALONE can rectify that.. But you have to have a "Dont Mind Waiting On You Lord" in ur spirit because He will fix it in his time...
ReplyDeleteUr absolutely right Sky.
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